A Soulful Glow…(1)

Posted: August 21, 2015 in God, Inspiration, life, NaBloPoMo, Peace, Personal, Social, Stress, The Art of Living, Yoga
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Yes, we are alive in this beautiful, ugly or whatever it could be termed but in this planet earth.  A few days before, I was going through some very tough situations. Somehow I was killing myself slowly with something or by anything. One fine morning found one of my friend was trying to maintain a distance with me. I noticed it on the very first day but didn’t say anything. The next day I asked him directly and got no answer. I said, I am sorry if I have done something or anything wrong. Trust me it was not intentional. It is not that I could not live without that friend. Actually he is some kind of my colleague cum friend. Who cares about how many friends they come in terms during their job in a specific company? But in this case, as I was disturbed with many things, so I planned to identify things one by one and consider them as issues constraint to my happiness. After some caring try, the problem with my friend got sorted out and he stopped avoiding me.

I was having tough time at home too. My wife returns office late in the afternoon and most of the time much later than I reach. It was never a problem with me but I wanted her to take care of a few things or else alone, I was not able to do everything at home and consider someone to stay always with me like a guest. We have a cook who comes twice a day. She is an elderly lady who comes early in the morning, cooks breakfast and lunch for us and then in the evening for cooking our dinner. Everyday morning, it is me who wakes up early and open the door and then instruct her what to cook. In the evening, if I get a bit late and she leaves, we happily order food from outside. Just to catch our cook, I have to leave office exactly on time which is really troublesome sometime. In India, we are habituated to work on extended hours without any extra pay. There I see my friends are working and I am the one who leaves office exactly on time. Even if I leave on time and find huge traffic at road, still I am late to get hold of my cook. Cleaning of rooms, putting things in proper place, and one by one everything was coming on my head. It happened like if I stop doing things at home, then except watching what my servants are doing at their own choice and wish, I don’t have anything to do at home. Slowly dust, dirt, negative energy was covering my place. For a pair of socks, I would have to check every places, most of the clothes smelly due to frequent rain and elongated time for drying up, cook started putting more oils in food resulting upset stomach most of time and then outburst of such negative energies converted in to anger. I was getting angry for everything at home. I was getting angry with my parents, with my friends and with my wife too. I was being impatient at road while driving and increased my smoking and dragged it to almost double the numbers I used to smoke in last ten years. I started drinking almost every evening. I used to get impatient after reaching home. Without watching TV and watching scattered costly things here and there, I literally had nothing to do except consoling my mind and controlling temper with a glass of whiskey.

In office, I used to get disturbed with anything my boss instructs me to do, I started reading newspapers with more attention but not a single news was getting saved in my mind. After playing cricket for school team, college team and then office team, I was forced to seat in bench in my present company. There was a huge cloud of depression around me and I was not doing anything right.

  1. poulami says:

    very nice write sir…


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